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File this under.... fresh ingredients.... yeah..... The Angry Birds have started laying and today I got my first green egg!

Cooking is "serious" business. You have to know and use the correct terminology or you will be misunderstood..... Growing up, I never knew what to call alot of the usual kitchen utensils. I was in there by myself and left to my own devices. This was before Google and having information at your fingertips. (I had a 1950s set of Encyclopedia Britannica at home and the library 10 blocks away.) While what came out of the kitchen was usually edible, I was learning as I went. To this day, I call these 2 items by the names I gave them at the age of 7. I tend to confuse people by not being able to verbally spout SPATULA fast enough due to this encoding. This results in embarrassment on my part and astonished laughter from the other person. I present to you: A Squishy A Flipper-dicker You're welcome. Shameless plug: if you're in need of additional squishies** or flipper-dickers in your home, click on the links. ** I am an Amazon Associate and your purchase through this program gives me a little bit of commission and helps pay for this website.

This was Dad's saying every year for any of the major holidays. He didn't understand all the hubbub over the deal. He was a depression era baby and I shudder to think what their major holidays were like during those tough years. I LOVED all the hubbub. The decorating, the wrapping presents, and especially the cooking. I pushed to get to do it ALL. I loved trying a new recipe every year for the family to try out. Since Dad passed, the major holidays that I was so used to cooking up a storm for have fallen away. C-bullshit also cancelled the Friendsgiving I used to do each year on Dad's birthday. The past couple years have been an adjustment. It's almost a feeling of being bereft. Easter, I eat at McDonald's. I don't cook for a week to feed 100 people for Friendsgiving. I don't make gallons of candy to give out. I still have to stop myself from canning dozens of jams and jellies for gifts. I used to make 100 loaves of banana and zucchini bread each year. All gone. Gratitude. Being thankful for the peace. Embracing this slower pace to life and holidays. No more craziness and stress. No more thousands of dollars spent on gifts each year for everybody. No gift wrapping. No $1500 grocery bill for the Friendsgiving. (Cause I always made WAY too much food.) No fussing over the decorations and having them be "perfect" for each dinner and all over every surface and keeping little hands and paws out of them. My new holiday tradition is to find a project. I can keep myself busy all day; doing something I enjoy. This year is gonna be canning turkey. I'm gonna try a couple different ways of fixing and canning the birds. Raw pack and cooked. Probably gonna make gallons of broth. With Handsome around now, things will probably change again. I hear we are going out to lunch tomorrow!

I kept seeing videos and posts about the 29 cents a pound turkeys, 55 cents a pound turkeys, 98 cents a pound turkeys.... Aldi was gonna match their 2019 Thanksgiving prices..... whatever.... I rarely travel to "town" anymore. I live nowhere close to a large population center, so finding GREAT deals on the turkey was gonna be a trick. I wanted the 98 cent deal. Tried Aldi, and they were $1.07 and that was NOT good enough (yes, those Dad genes are strong). I ran into town quick yesterday morning early, like 7am early, and was able to find the 98 cents a pound turkeys at Walmart! I bought 4. A turkey breast also showed up yesterday, another blessing! I set 2 of the turkeys and the breast in the extra fridge to thaw. I've got a canning project for Thursday and Friday. I will take somemore crappy pix with my phone as I work on it. I don't have the equipment for filming yet. We are gonna eat turkey and venison.... for years.... Ha!

You have to know the rules before you know which ones to break. My name is Crazy Jar Lady and I am a rebel canner..... With that being said; there are some rules established by the USDA that I will not break. One of them being most low-acid foods going into the pressure canner. There are some folks that waterbath everything as that is all that used to be available. One of these days we will have a science lesson and go over the big B (botulism) and how attempting to destroy it affects our food. Basic rules: water bath canning (top temp 212 degrees) is for high acid foods, specifically 4.6 pH or below, like tomatoes and their various products, fruits, jams, etc. Pressure canning (top temp 240 degrees) is for low-acid foods, such as meats, soups, vegetables, etc. USDA has established processing times for common items and you can find that information in several core books. The safest thing to do is to educate yourself. I will also make a post about canning books and ones that I prefer. Now.... The USDA hasn't had the time or the funding to test every little thing. Common sense has to come into play. Processing times are based upon the temperature of the product rising inside the jar, while inside the canner, to the necessary level to kill off the bad germs. So a thicker product equals a longer processing time. Example: grape juice (thin like water) is 20 min and salsa (chunky and thick) is 40 min, both water bath. You're also going to find lots of conflicting information. Somebody says one thing is ok. Another person does it another way. Their grandma did it that way and their mom-in-law taught them something else..... Go back to the book. Keep that book handy. Say you get a deal on a pile of pears and you just want to can slices in a light syrup. Having a basic canning book on hand is going to give you that information quickly without having to get online or call grandma and wake her up. I am in no way telling you to do as I do! I am only telling you what I did and how I did it. I am NOT telling you to do it! My Ball Blue Book is from 1960. Here's where my rebel comes in, mostly in pressure canning. I have successfully canned sausage gravy, milk, pumpkin puree, bacon.... all items highly contested by the "pearl clutchers" and not tested by the USDA. I use times listed in the 1960 book for basic items because alot of the newer recommendations are so out there. Have they lost their damned minds?! Pressure canning tomatoes?! Come on..... Some people are just flat out pressure canning everything; talk about losing flavor and vitamins that you don't need to! You don't need to heat your pineapple to 240 degrees Margaret..... I get a little worked up about this. Very often, you come across great deals on gallon cans of various products and that is just too much for your household at once. It's simple to portion it out and re-can the item so it's shelf stable. This also tends to be frowned upon. Let me drop one more bomb: some low-acid items do not survive the pressure canning process very well. Sweet corn, especially the super-sweet varieties tend to scorch. Meats in sweet or heavily flavored sauces also tend to burn; sloppy joes, taco meat, bbq pork, etc. If you KNOW the item you're canning is going to be heated to boiling 10 minutes prior to eating it, waterbathing these low acid foods is a viable option. (Again, some folks still just waterbath everything.) What is a "pearl clutcher"? Picture a sweet southern lady being offended, the sharp intake of breath at whatever expletive that was uttered, the hand to the chest, grabbing the ubiquitous string of pearls around her neck..... When rebel canners talk about all the different things they can; panties get bunched. We are going to poison our families.... blah blah blah You're not going to poison anyone if you use common sense, know the rules and the reasons; and know which rules can be safely broken.

Bestie gave me a sizeable container of her homemade chicken soup today! She said there was something missing. My first thought was I bet it's just salt. (Which makes me think I might have forgotten the salt in my Salsa Verde cause it's missing something.) The soup was fantastic, by the way. It just needed a touch, literally a couple shakes of the salt shaker into my cup. Now, because I cannot leave anything alone, my dumbass added pepper and parsley. The pepper was good. The parsley... well, I added way too much and the broth turned green! Since parsley doesn't taste like much, it didn't hurt it. I finished the WHOLE container for lunch. Super yum. I also came across a new soup recipe to try (thank you Pinterest) and the seasonings listed in it are numerous and includes 2 whole lemons which is a little out there for me. Everything else was normal, tomatoes, beans, garlic, onions, salt, pepper, parsley. It's a canning recipe so the amounts are large. These 2 things got me to thinking.... Seasoning food for canning and seasoning food for a meal are really 2 different things. When you're going to can something, you want to make sure the core seasonings are in there. (There are some seasonings that don't can well. We will talk about those another day.) You probably aren't going to be able to adjust it perfectly as many times your meats are uncooked and so yuck on taste-testing that. You season the product according to the recommendations in the recipe and worry about adjusting flavors later upon serving the food. I'm terrible about adding enough seasoning (salt included) when I'm making broth especially. I feel like my gravies and soups eat salt on their own just because the broth I started with was so woefully lacking. I'm conservative while seasoning anything. I have a few herbs and mixes that I'm comfortable using and know how they affect flavor. I'm sure someone else who is more adventurous in seasoning food (like my Aunt) would come along and think my food is bland. Just a couple months ago, I made a loaf of Herb Bread for the first time and it called for thyme. I had it on hand from a project but don't really use it much. What a surprise to my taste buds when I tried it for the first time! My point is, to you and to myself; don't be afraid to season your food. Try something new now and again. Also try not to add too much! Keep tasting if you are able. If you think "something" is missing and you don't know what, add salt. Salt even worked for the grape juice I canned. Hey Bestie, thanks again for the soup! Made my day!

What have I gotten myself into?! Handsome has brought home the venison.... Deer season 2022.... Handsome is an extrovert and can talk to anybody. In the process, he made friends with a hunting outfitter that offered him the deer the guests decided not to take home with them. I was thinking this would be great as the deer weren't wasted and we would have meat on hand. I had no idea it would be this many; what a blessing! So far, one buck is in the freezer, 2 more are getting processed, and the neighbors have shown up with a doe. Rumor is, there might be 2 more bucks coming! Aaaaack! Hoping to get the first deer put into jars sometime this week. Need room in the freezer!

Spent the day cleaning and organizing the pantry. I was even able to shampoo more of the carpet. The last of the sloppy joes made my lunch today. I decided to use the remainder of the cooked meat mix to make Goulash. This is a use what you have/like, make it work type recipe. The microwave defrosted the cooked meat mix. While that was running, I started the pasta to cook. This was a quart bag of medium shells I had leftover from something else. Then I drained the pasta and left it set while I worked on the sauce. (If you wanted, you could use two stockpots to cook the pasta and the sauce at the same time; I just didn't want to. 3 loads of dishes in one day was enough for me.) Place the cooked meat mix, mushrooms, diced tomatoes, spaghetti sauce in the stockpot; stir in the pasta. (I used all store bought canned tomato products as I had them on hand and I use them up before I use my big-effort home-canned food.) Add in more spaghetti sauce if needed. Then add a few handfuls of shredded cheese. I used mozzarella tonight since that's what I had, but I usually use colby-jack. I adjusted the seasoning with Italian seasoning, salt and pepper. Simmer until the cheese is all melty and incorporated into the sauce; heat through. Serve with bread and butter.

I've learned all kinds of cooking tricks from various people over the years. This particular one came from an ex. He was picky about how his eggs were fried. They weren't pretty but he always added a slice of cheese ontop of them to cover that up. I had never had a fried egg with anything added but salt and pepper. This was a revelation and became a thing. "Whaddya want for breakfast?" "Cheesy eggs with cheese!" I had managed to get really sick. During that time in my life, I was having ALOT of digestive issues without solutions and had a colonoscopy the day before. Then, Ex brought the stomach flu home.... I landed in the ER with dehydration and passed out on the stretcher. When I was awakened by the inept nurse putting an IV in backwards, she asked me what I wanted to eat first when I felt better. Ex was standing in the doorway and my aggravated mother was sitting in the chair next to the stretcher. I blurted out, at the top of my lungs, Cheesy eggs with CHEESE!!!!!!! Nurse leaves laughing, Ex was laughing, Mother is left perplexed. I was so out of it, Ex had to explain the eggs. With that, it really has always become a thing. Back when I cooked for a crew, I fixed the eggs like this. Turns out it was a revelation for them as well. Occasionally I would ask what they wanted and would hear, "Cheesy Eggs with CHEESE!" These are the tales we are left with in life. How do you make Cheesy Eggs with CHEESE?! Fry eggs to your liking and just before they are done, add a slice of the type of cheese you like best to the top. Let that melt and serve with whatever sides you like.

In my photo yesterday, you could just see the rings had started to rust around the edges. I've got a whole dishpan full of rusted rings now. When you read the canning books it says if they are rusted to pitch them. I disagree; I feel like that is just marketing to sell more stuff. I will pitch a ring when it's so rusted it won't turn onto a jar anymore. Only then. The rings function solely to hold the lid down and nothing more. They don't need to be pretty. And if you're using vinegar in your water because it's hard, they won't be pretty for long. I also wash my rings in the dishwasher. Once I started pressure canning, my rings took a real turn to the ugly. Yours will too! Your main concern is the product inside the jar. The outside doesn't matter. Top left, new ring washed once. Top right, newer ring used a few times. Bottom left, ring been thru the mill but still good. Bottom middle, ring starting to get a little eh. Bottom right, ring getting a little nasty. Now compare the top photo to the bottom and the bottom middle ring and the bottom right ring. In the top photo, it looks like the ring on the bottom right would be the one to pitch. Nope. Pitch the one in the bottom middle. See how it has bad rust right on the screw line? That is not going to go on a jar easily. Or save it for a craft. As a side note: Rings tend to reproduce while lids don't. Every time you buy a new pack of jars, there's a dozen rings. It's great, you never have to buy rings again! Even though most of my jars are from the 1940s thru 1980s, I have purchased numerous dozens of new jars. I store the rings several ways, I have some ring organizers I've made from wire hangers, just in an extra dishpan, and I've seen several people use bungee cords hooked into their shelving.

Get your mind out of the gutter.... we don't talk about that kind of stuff on here. Since I've been pressure canning, I love finding a good deal on meats and canning them up so we have them for later. It's a good feeling to pull something I canned off the shelf 1 year, 2 years, 6 years later and it's just as good as the day I canned it. We can talk shelf life another day. It was shortly after I got my first pressure canner, the local Mennonite store had the big hot dogs on sale. They were so big, I had to cut an inch off the end of them to fit them in the jars. I was able to fit 7 of them per quart jar. I also like to boil hot dogs in beer for extra flavor when I cook them. My beginner infinite wisdom told me to add beer to the jars too.... yeah, that would be a good idea. It was NOT a good idea. Shortly into the processing time I smelled a whole bunch of beer and hot dogs.... Being patient, I went ahead with the full 90 minute processing time. As it turns out, beer expands when it is cooked and SO DO HOT DOGS. While I had started the canner with only 3 quarts of water in it; I opened it to find it was more than half full of beer, hot dog juice and water. The jars came out covered in greasy goo. The entire kitchen smelled like a baseball stadium. I waited patiently (hovered) to see if they would seal. Every single jar sealed, even with all that siphoning. It was a valuable lesson. I opened and tried a jar the next day, they are good and don't taste "canned". Yes I still have some. When you need a conversation piece; make the canned hot dogs. They all split and exploded inside the jars. My friend saw them and called them "exploding vag weinies". Side splitting comedy there....

Spent the day cleaning, organizing, doing dishes and laundry; which never seem to end... There were a few snow flurries earlier and there is a chance for some snow tonight. Sounds like my pantry is going to be overrun tomorrow, one of my friends is cleaning out her pantry and sending me all the stuff her hubby won't eat or use. I'm excited about that, these types of things are usually the impetus for a big batch of something to be canned. Ran to town quick and picked up my new portable carpet shampooer!** It's a beast and not only has a great spray feature, but also sucks up the dirty water really well. I'm using it on a small area of short berber carpet. It is getting down into the fibers and sucking up more dirt and crap than I knew was in there. I spray a small section, letting that soak for awhile, sucking that dirty water up and spraying it again. When the area is all done, I will do it all over with plain water. I'm using the solution that came with it. ** I'm an Amazon Associate. This means if you click on the link and possibly buy something linked on this website, I might get a little commission that helps support the cost of this blog.